Ann Rollins Writes that She Was Nearly Blind and Deaf on Earth, Was Not Unhappy, and Tells the Secret

January 9, 1917
Received by James Padgett
Washington, D.C.

I am here, your Grandmother.

Well, my dear son, it has been sometime since I wrote you, and I feel that I must say a few words to you, as you are in a condition that needs some encouragement and sympathy. I love you, as you know, and while I have not written you lately, yet I have been with you a great deal watching over you and trying to influence you with my love and powers of bringing to you spiritual thoughts and soul's longings.

Now, I want to tell you a few things that may help you in your moments of worry. When on earth, as you know, I was nearly blind and deaf, and in such condition as would naturally cause me to worry and be unhappy, but I did not worry and was not unhappy; and the secret was that I had in my soul the Love of the Father, and it was so real to me that no doubt of its existence in my soul ever came to cause me unhappiness.

And that Love, I know and assure you, is the same kind of Love that now floods my whole being and gives me the happiness that I now possess. I remember that I did not have many material things to trouble me, for you looked after my material welfare and was always kind to me and loving, yet, nevertheless, if it had not been for the Love that I speak of, I can readily see that I should have been very unhappy and worried a great deal for my natural inclination was to worry when things did not go right, as we said.

And so I tell you from actual experience that all your worries, and by this I mean your causes of worry, may be taken from your conscious self if you will only seek for and obtain, which you certainly can do, this Love of the Father. It is astonishing how efficacious it is to cause the worries and troubles to disappear. They, as you may know, are very largely a matter of the mind and while in a certain sense they are real, yet the mind or its condition is the real cause of the realization of the worries.

And consider for a moment the fact, and I know that you will agree with me that it is a fact, that the indulging in these worries does not in one particular remove the material causes of the worry and does not in any manner bring relief from the troubles. No matter how much you may allow your mind to dwell on these things, and how intensely you may worry, the cause  the material cause - remains. You may say, and it is natural to do so, that it is easy enough to advise that you should not let these inconvenient things cause you to worry, but when you come to the practical experience and are the sufferer from these conditions, it is not so easy to throw aside the effect of the troubles on the mind.

Well, there is much truth in that, but notwithstanding, this Love that I tell you of, when living in the soul, will make even that effort easy to accomplish. The philosophy of the phenomenon, if you may call it such, is that this Love is of such real substantial Essence that it takes control of the mind and eliminates the consciousness of the reality of the causes of the worry.

Now I do not want to be understood as intending to convey the idea that these material causes are not real, for I am not a Christian Scientist to that extent, but what I do mean is that, notwithstanding the real existence of these causes, the effects of this Love and the faith that accompanies it upon the mind, which is the real cause of the worry, is such that forgetfulness of these causes of worry takes the place of the constant indulging in the thoughts of their existence and the unhappy consequence that must flow from them. The cause itself is not removed but the consciousness of their existence, for the time being, is dissipated, and to the mind that is, thus, influenced by the Love, these causes are as if they were not.

Of course, they are existing and facing you to some extent, but it will come to you that they are not so overwhelming and insurmountable as they would appear were this Love absent from the soul and its influence from the mind. And, in addition to this, Love and faith creates a confidence in the power of the Father and His willingness to help that engenders courage, which enables the possessor of this confidence to overcome these causes of worry that he would not otherwise be able to do.

What I have said may be called the philosophy of the workings of this Love in its effective destruction of worry. But the great fact is that the Father does, as a truth, help the one who is in the condition of being possessed with this Love. His Love is real and His help is real, and the effect is to make the causes named things of unreality so far as the happiness of the object of this help is concerned. And as a truth, shown by the experience of mortals, a very large proportion of the worries and troubles that harass and cause so much unhappiness to mortals is a thing of the imagination and never realized.

So my dear son, try to understand what I have written and apply it to your own condition, and you will find that your worries are not near so great as you now think. I know just what is facing you, but as you have been told by others who have written you, in a short time you will be relieved, and the sun will again shine in your consciousness of existence, and you will become in a much better condition to do your work, both that of your business and that of the Master. You must not for a moment think that you will not be looked after so that you can do and complete the task that you have been selected to do. This is as certain as that the sun shines, and while for a time yet some disagreeable and disheartening things may confront you, yet it will not be a great while before they will become things of the past, and you will be in condition to do this work without hindrance or interference.

So think of all that I have said and try to believe and make a practical application of my philosophy; and above all pray to the Father for a greater inflowing of this Love and have faith to realize that it will become yours, limited only by your longings and sincerity of aspirations.

Well, I will come soon and write you a long letter on some spiritual truth that will be of interest to you. I must stop now, and so with all my love and the Father's blessings, I will say, good night.

Your loving Grandmother

Ann Rollins Writes About Seeking the Love of God on Earth; Meeting Jesus; Describes His Appearance; and Discusses Probation

May 13, 1915
Received by James Padgett
Washington, D.C.

I am here, your Grandmother.

I am happier than I can tell you. I am living in my home of which I told you a few nights ago, and it is a beautiful home beyond the possibility of description. Tonight, I want to tell you of my experience in seeking the Love of God, and in realizing that He is my Father, who loves me with a Love that knows no shadow of wavering or cessation.

I was not always filled with faith, or believed so implicitly in prayer, but in my early married life, I received the conviction that if I would be happy in life and fitted to receive the blessings which the Bible promised to those who should seek the Lord and his Love, I must see the necessity of seeking; and I, with all the earnestness of my nature, commenced seeking for the Father's Love, and as a result I found it and with it a great happiness and peace.

You know what my spiritual condition was in my later years on earth, and how my faith was such that, although I was nearly deaf and blind, yet, I was happy and joyful. Well, when I came to the spirit world, I brought that faith and love with me, and I found that it was just as real here as it had been on earth. Of course, in some of my beliefs I was mistaken, such as my belief that Jesus was God, and that his death and blood saved or could save me from sin and damnation; but notwithstanding my mistakes in these particulars, my love for the Father was not interfered with, and I continued to live in that love and was happy.

I had not been in the spirit world a great while before spirits of a higher order than myself came to me and told me many wonderful things of the Father's Kingdom, and that my progress to the higher spheres would depend upon my receiving more of this Divine Love in my soul and becoming more at-one with the Father.

The first time I saw Jesus was after I had been in the Third Sphere a short while, and when I met him he impressed me as being the most beautiful and loving spirit that I had ever seen; and when he told me that he was Jesus, I, of course, was somewhat surprised, because I had believed that he was sitting in the Heavens on the right hand of God, as I had been taught on earth to believe.

And when he saw my surprise, he looked on me with a wonderful love and said that I must not further believe that he was God, or even a part of Him, or that he was in the high Heavens accepting the worship of men, for he was only a spirit as I was and was still working among mortals as well as spirits to lead them into the light and the way to the Father's Love.

At first, I confess, it was difficult for me to believe this, and I had my doubts; but his manner of talking to me and the wonderful love that he displayed, not only for me but for all mankind, soon convinced me that he was the true Jesus and not an imposter. And afterwards, I met many spirits who knew him and had been his followers for many years, and they told me that he was the Jesus of the Bible, and I could not do anything else but believe. And now, after my long years of association with him and feeling his ministrations of love and the influence of his greatness, I know that he is the true Jesus, who by his teachings and overwhelming love saves men from their sins, by showing them the way to the Father's Kingdom. So my dear son, do not doubt what I tell you now in reference to this matter, or what I have already told you.

Well, it is somewhat difficult to describe his appearance, but I will try. He is of a commanding figure, as you say on earth. His features are regular, and his eyes are of a deep blue, almost a purple blue, with such depths of love in them that under its influence you almost forget to note the color of his eyes. The hair is a beautiful brown, worn long and parted in the middle so that it falls over his shoulders. His nose is straight and somewhat long, with nostrils very refined and showing the artistic elements in his nature. His other features are in keeping with those I have described. He wears a beard quite long and very silky and brown like his hair. His manner is grace itself and modesty personified and, yet, in him is the intensity of feeling which can show itself in just indignation when the occasion requires. And, yet, with all the great beauty of his person and the greater love of his soul showing itself, he is very humble - more so than any spirit I have seen.

I have given you a bare outline of his appearance, and you will never fully realize in your mind's eye just what his appearance is; and only when you come over and meet him will you fully understand the appearance of the most wonderful and beautiful and loving spirit in all God's universe.

Some day this will happen; and you will not have the doubts that I had, and your heart will go out to him from the first moment of your meeting. My dear son, it is a greater privilege than you can appreciate to be thus prepared to meet your friend and teacher; for he is your friend to a degree that is beyond what I thought he would ever be while you are on earth.

So you see, my experience was a somewhat exceptional one, and one secret of its being so is that I received very great faith and the Love of my Father while on earth.

While the teachings of many preachers are that the earth is the only place of probation, and that teaching is not correct; yet, if it were believed more, and mankind should prepare their future in view of that belief, many a man, when he becomes a spirit, would avoid experiences that are very unpleasant and retard his progress in the spirit world. Of course, such a belief (that the earth is the only place of probation) when the mortal fails to make the preparation, will work him great injury after he becomes a spirit; because such a belief is difficult to get rid of, and as long as it lasts the spirit is very apt to believe that his status is fixed forever and, hence, he will not progress until he accepts the truth.

So you see after all, the only good belief is a belief in the truth, which never changes.

Probation is not confined to the earth life but is with man and spirits alike. In fact it never ends, for each preceding condition of a spirit is nothing more than a probationary condition to what follows. But the great probationary condition, undoubtedly, is that which exists for the mortal while on earth; and if that probation is accepted and made the most of, the spirit of man gains an advantage which is beyond my ability to describe.

Sometimes men do not attempt to take all the advantage of this probation on earth, and come to the spirit world in all their material thoughts and sins, with their souls dead, as Jesus said, and find that in such condition, as spirits, they have a more difficult time to awaken from such condition and progress; and I am informed that some spirits have been in this world for many, many years and have not yet had an awakening. So you must see the importance of taking advantage of the earth probation.

Well dear son, I have written a great deal and must stop now, though I should like to write you a much longer time. So with all my love I will close, and sign myself,

Your loving Grandmother,
Ann Rollins